Monday, February 4, 2013

The Academic Zombie

So my first week of the semester is over.... 2 classes that I am taking for my degree and 1 class that I am teaching. And while it's only 1 week in, the difference between me getting around Manhattan for the fall semester and now is a complete 180.

Between the last day of the fall semester (an easy quantitative methods final) and the first day of the spring semester, I saw my first stretch marks (and oddly had a good cry, thank you bizarre pregnancy hormones!), I felt my first kicks, I became obviously pregnant and not 'fat' (I carry low so although I popped early, I feel like it could have been mistaken for fat instead of baby. And my friends telling me "I wouldn't have been able to tell you were pregnant anyway!" didn't help), and I got a perfectly clear anatomy scan at 20 weeks 4 days. 

Hitting that half-way threshold means a lot more than just being closer to delivering and holding the baby than when you conceived him or her. It means the beginning of really feeling pregnant - getting random itchy and/or brown spots on your body and enough acid in your stomach to serve as a biological krakatoa. It means learning the difference between your baby shifting in your belly (which I equate to a snake slithering around in there), elbowing you and giving you a solid kick. It means learning your baby's personality and getting used to when they wake up (like right after I pee when I get up every morning between 5:30 and 6:30). 

But although I mentally feel like myself, I no longer physically feel like myself. I'm not depressed about it - I know a few pregnant people who are. But I just wish there was an easier way for me to get around and not feel so physically winded by the time I get to where I have to go. My consulting work and my research work (which I'll get into somewhat in a later post) can be done mostly from home - which really is a blessing. But I can't teach 27 college kids about epidemiology from my house - and I wouldn't want to anyway. I love interacting with them in person - I just wish I didn't have to wobble through East Harlem and Midtown Manhattan amid a sea of people, with a pulled groin muscle and breasts that feel more like udders. 

Ahh - to be pregnant. I wouldn't want it any other way :).  

I'll update again soon


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